give in or give up

there is a possibility that at least one of ur previous guys will wake up one day and realise that he really liked you. maybe the exact same day you'll wake up next to the one who already knew, and he didnt have to wait for months to realise.
you cant be the person who holds back because thats what we do. love and fail until we get it right. if we dont we'll never know whether it all worths it or not. and thats the question u have to ask to yourself:

would u really want to wake up one day and realise that you should have never given up?

what do kids think about it?

'When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn't bend over and 

 paint her toenails anymore. So my grandfather does it for her all 

 the time, even when his hands got arthritis too. That's love.' 

 Rebecca- age 8

 

'When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. 

You just know that your name is safe in their mouth.' 

Billy - age 4

 

'Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your 

French fries without making them give you any of theirs.' 

Chrissie  - age 6

'Love is what makes you smile when you're tired.' 

Terri - age 4

 

'Love is when my mummy makes coffee for my daddy and she takes a 

sip before giving it to him, to make sure the taste is OK.' 

Danny - age 7

'Love is when you kiss all the time. Then when you get tired of 

kissing, you still want to be together and you talk more. My Mummy 

and Daddy are like that.' 

Emily - age 8

'Love is what's in the room with you at Christmas if you stop 

opening presents and listen.' 

Bobby - age 7

 

'If you want to learn to love better, you should start with a 

friend who you hate,' 

Nikka - age 6 

 

'Love is when you tell a guy you like his shirt, then he wears it 

everyday.' 

Noelle - age 7

  

'During my piano recital, I was on a stage and I was scared. I 

looked at all the people watching me and saw my daddy waving and 

smiling. He was the only one doing that. I wasn't scared anymore.' 

 Cindy - age 8

'My mummy loves me more than anybody You don't see anyone else 

kissing me to sleep at night.'

 Clare - age 6

 

 'Love is when Mummy gives Daddy the best piece of chicken.' 

Elaine-age 5

 

'Love is when Mummy sees Daddy smelly and sweaty and still says he 

is handsomer than Robert Redford.' 

Chris - age 7

 

'Love is when your puppy licks your face even after you left him 

alone all day' 

Mary Ann - age 4

 

 

'When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little 

stars come out of you.' 

 Karen - age 7

 

 

'You really shouldn't say 'I love you' unless you mean it. But if 

you mean it, you should say it a lot. People forget.' 

Jessica - age 8

 

And the final one -- Author and lecturer Leo Buscaglia once talked 

about a contest he was asked to judge. The purpose of the contest 

was to find the most caring child. The winner was a four year old 

child whose next door neighbor was an elderly gentleman who had 

recently lost his wife. Upon seeing the man cry, the little boy 

went into the old gentleman's yard, climbed onto his lap, and just 

sat there. When his Mother asked what he had said to the neighbour, 

the little boy said, 'Nothing, I just helped him cry'

questions

If you're given a choice between money & sex appeal, take the money. As you get older, the money will become your sex appeal.

Before you criticise someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticise them, you are a mile away from them, and you have their shoes.

The stupid niether forgive nor froget. The naive forgive & forget. The wise forgive but do not forget.

A woman should hold onto her youth, but not while he's driving.

Show me someone who never gossips and I'll show you someone who isn't interested in people.

Even a broken clock is right twice a day.

A wise woman will always let her husband have her way.

The best way to get revenge on a man that you hate is to marry him.

Money can't buy you happiness, but it buys you the sort of misery that you can live with.

Faith can move mountains... she's a pretty big girl.

Some where on this earth, every 10 seconds, a woman gives birth to a child. We must find this woman & stop her at once.

If you want to know how old a woman is, ask her sister-in-law.

The best way to lose weight is to put the handle of the fridge two inches from the ground.

Marry an archaeologist- the older you get, the more interested in you he is.

I don't know the difference between ignorance & apathy & I don't care.

who invented love?

The cursor blinks every beat and in my head I know I have to put my fingers on the buttons and start asking myself questions that I will never erase from my head.. Answers I will never get, time I will never get back.. Answers, questions.. Time.. My eyes are red and tired, and I can still smell you on my pillow and my skin. Im not in pain. I have this weird glance of light inside of me.. Everything that defines me smiles. I don’t. Im scared.
Who started love.. Who thought of it? Is it divine or a product of human creativity..? Is love an idea, a state of mind or just something that someone invented to make himself feel happier by letting himself fall into.. Maybe we are all taking love's path because we feel that we owe to ourselves to be happy.. Maybe not. Tell me that you’ve never thought it was all a lie.

Does love comes from high above or from deep within? Answer me. You can’t. What we can’t deny is that love does inspire. Sometimes it inspires poets and artists and some other times it inspires plain humans like me.. To make mistakes and be open.
Im wondering if there are more kind of loves than one.. I don’t dare to say the word, but if that’s love, it’s a weird love that surprises me. A love I have never introduced with my deepest heart. Too soon.. It’s too soon I know.. I can hear you saying those words, and I can imagine my eyes getting wet and my heart start beating differently. Too soon.. 

Tell me when the right moment is. Tell me where the right place is.. and then promise me and assure me im going to be on this same earth alive tomorrow.. next week, next month. You can’t. Then answer me why it’s too soon. You can’t. You will say that I may be doing a mistake.. I don’t care. Mistakes and faults are the reason why a thousand books and songs have been written... and more.. Do tell me that you haven’t been in the position where you had to take a risk. And you did. And you failed. You can’t. 

Thoughts in my head, your smell on my pillow and on my skin, half a page of questions. Questions I will never erase from my head. Answers I will never get, time I will never get back.. Answers, questions.. Time..
The cursor will stop blinking, but my heart will still steal different beats.. It beats.. Differently now than before...

love letter...

It’s untrue when you leave imperfection and live perfection..

The night air is cool and soothing, and overhead the stars are coming out like specks of silver dust.. This same night is going to break to pieces and as it fells heavily down in its shiny pieces, I will not fail to listen to my dreams land on my shoulders. Read carefully, this is the first love letter I attend to write in my life.

Before you, I was white as a spirit. Now all I am is a stained man, stained from my own desire, and I can taste it and smell it, deep red as an undiscovered wound within. And to think I never believed in love at first sight. I gave birth of a life that could be, that took form out of early memories..

I met you on this site, the same day exactly three years ago. I saw you and I knew I had to have you. I had longed for you since the first second; I hungered you, imagined you but never tasted you. I let one by one all the castles on my body to fall and surrender to your charms. Powerless and fool since then I imagine you come close to my ear and whisper soft words. Soft like clouds, just before the sun bursts through them. Hard like reality, before the night awakens it.

I wish for a day where I could hiss those words close to your ear and you feel my hot breath tickling your skin and your heart. I never murmured it and I never shouted it. I am hearing no violins and I know you can play my every string.

Happiness consists of no desires at all and at the same time all the desires in the world. It also consists of no concerns. It’s a dreamful of floating. Humans have invented so many words to describe the exact degree in which a person pleases our senses. And you can please everything – for that I’m sure of. Whether that is a sweaty night in bed, or a sweet night out in the world. Bonded together, I can let myself become half and then connect with your half. And while every single person on this planet thinks that wishes on stars are magic, I am making wishes on you. You are my star and while they are making wishes on stars, I wish on you that I had you.

There are nights where sleep doesn’t touch me. The sun steals in my room and I watch as the light throws long fingers across the floor. It makes the curtain glow with power and my eyes hurt. And then the next minute, your name in my head feels as warm as someone’s mouth on my soft neck. Sometimes the thought of you being here hides behind my ear and whispers me your mysteries. The thought of you being here tells me that my love for you is no captivity but freedom.

I’m a writer and you know me well enough, to know that I believe that words don’t get too deep. They can’t go through the human skin. But your words are already up to my soul. I promise you now; every time u speak to me everything around will vanish. They will become one with the light in your eyes, one with the shine that they will be giving me. One beauty will be interrupted by other.

Hit my life down, throw it to my feet if you have to. Tell me that you don’t want to be here. But if this letter bounces in your head for more than a while, reach for me.. I will be here at the corner of the world. Take my dreams from the hand, and lead them to the safety of your arms.

Adam & Eve

one of the biggest facts in history of human race is what came after 'biting Eden's apple'. okay so two humans made a stupid mistake and shove down a fruit that a fool made them eat. to make it even easier for you, let me just say that the dudes ate a fucking apple for a snack, which for unverified reasons shouldn't be eaten. so what. do you make any sense out of this? because i certainly do not. what is the big fuss? their crime wasn't that bad at all if you ask me, so they get humiliated they way they did. to be dressed with costumes made of leaves?! when green wasn't even in fashion? make them look like stuffed wine leaves? to force Eve to give birth and suffer in a world with no basic medicine facilities? and poor Adam.. to go around looking for a job, when up that day was living like Prince Charles? to be thrown out their home, naked (for the record a leave is not clothing) and helpless? are we serious? is this justice? i think not!

of course, if things ended where they were kicked off that garden, the story would lose its interest. maybe a few producers would do a couple of movies about it, and it would have been all forgotten by now. the whole thing thought is that we keep paying that mistake until today. for a garden. for a snake. for an apple for Christ sake! its like a curse. we are born with it and we cant even reject it, or do something about it. it has no ending! it is making our shoulders heavy with guilds for sins we carry in our DNA!

and like that wasn't enough, we have a series of some enlightened men like Moses and St Gregory, that came and made up the hardest rules that anyone could possibly imagine. those rules are forced upon our innocent selves. ten rules the first guy, 7 deadly sins the other dude. all of the sudden there are so many that we don't know what to be scared of, what we should be scared off, what we should be careful from! confessions, guilds, punishment. and here i ask: is this life?

it is commonly accepted that we need changes. i don't know whether the politicians will do something about it, the EU, NATO, the Americans, but we are in desperate need of salvation. because, lets just face it, the world has changed. most of those rules aim to make our sin level reach the red - and we all know whose colour is that!

don't take me wrong, i am a Christian; i don't want to sound like a blasphemer. that is the last thing i want you to think. what i ask is mercy. what those dudes have done belongs to the past. what we should do is turn the page and move on. get over it if we really want to lead the humanity and other animals (snakes excluded) to Eden's garden.

distance

distance its just digits. the same way we invented math and create digit to count it, we invented cars and trains and most important of all, thoughts to narrow them down

Love is a choice not a feeling

Throughout our lives, we're told a lot of bullshit about love.
For example:
"Love means never having to say you're sorry." - "Love is blind."
And my personal favourite one: "You complete me."
As if another human being can actually make an unfulfilled person
become whole!This is trully ridiculous! God knows how many times ive heard those phrases and how many times i will be the one who feels like telling them. but thats not the point. the point is, do we actually know what we are doing when we are speaking out those words? do we really mean them or its just infatuation words we later on regret?!
well, whether they come in the form of song lyrics (i would know about this), movie lines (i would know about this), or cliche phrases passed down from generation to generation (oh i would know about this as fucking well), these
myths distort our thinking and cause us to develop unrealistic expectations of love.in other words, they help us/make us built an idea of love that aint right. and i say 'help us' because most of the times we want to have that idea. we feel that we owe it to ourselves to be happy so its like we built a paradise and then we try to get in.
those unrealistic expectations can cause a lot of drama.. but why? i keep wondering myself that and the answer is that it seds you up to be unhappy later. once you realise you cant get into the picture youve built in your head, hence, big disappointment. that is what kills the relationship since you are being prevented from developing and anjoying a real, healthy rship

When you're in love, you feel that butterflies-in-your-stomach, excited, happy, romantic, lovey feeling all the time. If that feeling goes away, something is wrong. but how true is this? When you accept this , no relationship of yours will ever stand a chance.i mean, who came up with the 'butterflies and the happy feeling in the first place?who? whoever did, i dont believe that that same very feeling can stay there for ever.
That's because a relationship between two human beings, each with their own flaws, is bound to have problems to work through and challenges to overcome. so they are gonna be moments where youre gonna be annoyed, angry or even bored with your guy!
In other words, when you expect something impossible from someone you love (for example perfection), you're bound to end up resenting them for letting you down. and while we all know that no one is perfect, thats what we all look for!

love is a CHOICE, not always an EMOTION. because sometimes when youre angry you dont wanna talk to the other person. you have every right to and you are probably doing the right thing. EMOTION. but what will make you go back and talk to him, accept his apology or give it, or even the feeling that somethings wrong and youre sad, well thats CHOICE. and it springs out from love. how many times we put down our own ego because we just want to move on with our guy? how many times we say we are sorry altho we feel that we have done nothing wrong? that is CHOICE.
In a relationship that lasts, each partner wakes up every day and actively CHOOSES to love their mate whether they feel the 'fucking butterflies' or not on that particular day.
Of course there should be romance and passion and excitement, but not every moment is going to feel like a honeymoon in paradise.That's not the way life goes.
i should know better because im one hell of a romantic guy, but it stars like a huge wave and then becomes a lil one on the shore. when i meet a guy im overly romantic to show him that i care. i cant help it otherwise. its in my brain. later on im explaining why.. back to my point, when i get into a rship with that very same guy i am less romantic and more realistic. i show him that i care but im not all over him. which is wrong because i scare them away with all my affection.. but thats another story.
When you adjust your expectations accordingly, you'll find that your satisfaction with your relationship will increase. and i wish everyone will did that. just have no expectations would be better but thats like asking global peace! (actually that would be easier)
Sure, you will get annoyed with one another. You will fight. You will struggle sometimes to figure out where the relationship is going. But you'll realize that it's normal to do so and that knowledge will give you the strength you need to work through it. what comes to my mind now im saying this is a lyric which says: 'the experience of survival is the key, to the gravity of love'. so very true to be a song.
I can speak from personal experience on this.
My last guy used to be my fav person in the world, and my relationship with him was better than any I've experienced in my life, and despite this fact, I still didn't always feel that "loving feeling" every day.

When we first started dating, we were together non-stop. We couldn't
get enough of each other. My heart skipped a beat every time he
walked in the room. Every joke he told was hilarious, every thought
he uttered was brilliant. In my eyes, he could do no wrong.

Now here i am several years later and life has gotten a little more, well, REAL.
Sometimes we used to get in a silly disagreement and it takes a day to
shake off that icky feeling (I call it a "fight hangover").
Sometimes I just need a break - a little alone time to read a book
or meet my mates for coffee, and that's ok.That doesn't mean that I didn't used to love him with every ounce of my being.
it s possible to LOVE someone even when, at the moment, you don't LIKE them very much! haha imagine you and your mum! sometimes you dont like her but you always love her!

When this happens, I know that those feelings of irritability or boredom will pass. And all it takes is connecting through a great conversation, a romantic date-night, or some other reminder of just how amazing our bond really is for that so "in love' feeling to come flooding back in. *crossing fingures*

One other important point that I want to bring up is that this"floating-on-Cloud-9" feeling that many of us associate with love is actually a result of a chemical released in our brains during the first few months (or years, depending on the scientific study you refer to) with a new partner. i have a few books for you to study if you want. and you can have my assignments as well.

This is called the "infatuation" phase. we all know what it is so i wont explain it any further as i would normally do :)

When you get into an established, long-term relationship with someone, a different chemical actually kicks in. One that makes you feel calmer, more secure and connected. This is a good thing - it means that you can actually come down from your whirlwind of can't-sleep-can't-eat-all-I-can-think-about-is-him and begin to
build a solid relationship based on who you really are as individuals and rooted in reality. thats why a lot of couples realise that they dont match as soon as they get married! call it excitement that last until commitment, call it what you want. it happens.

The downside is that those initial butterflies and excitement will subside quite a bit once you've hit this phase. It's completely normal and, frankly, unavoidable.
The good news is that you can get a lot of that exciting feelingback. It just takes a little effort.

Plan special dates. Take a little getaway (even a spur-of-the-moment weekend trip will do the trick). Do something spontaneous, like leaving a note in his briefcase that says "Come straight home tonight - I have a surprise for you" and greet him with a home cooked candlelight meal. or a shag. not neccesarilly with the right order :) All of these things will help to bring the butterflies back ... and keep them lasting long after your special moment is over.

Solutions to problems and the problem to the solution

i quess whoever made the rule knew better. i think what we are doing wrong as humans is not taking every moment as a special one and cherish it. its much more easier to miss something after its gone rather than when we already have it. maybe because we are too busy enjoying it.

i should know best about this one. ive always the guy who would like his jeans to be worn and slightly worn out, the one who would love the scratches on his ipod, the scratches on my character. that way i feel it mine: my jeans, my ipod, myself..
i know im right when i say that the result of the equation makes you realize how hard/interesting was the problem. its always the solution that makes you understand the problem.

and while some people are looking for solutions, life goes by with more problems. life is balanced as it is and we will never be creative enough to solve those problems. aka cherish every moment as it is. live now and forget later.

i hope to have confused you enough..

How to Survive Valentines day!

Hey all,

I have a confession to make:

I'm not crazy about Valentine's Day. In fact i hate it.

Now you may be wondering why a dating blogger doesn't LOVE the so-called "most romantic day of the year."

Well it's because this silly little holiday (hyped up commercially to sell greeting cards, chocolates and overpriced long-stem roses) has been so BLOWN OUT OF PROPORTION that it causes millions of people undue stress and misery!

If you're single, you may dread Valentine's Day because you don't have a date or aren't in a relationship with someone special.

But that doesn't mean that couples are off the hook:

Men feel pressure to spend a lot of money to impress their date (restaurants knowingly create a "special" high-priced menu and the cost of flowers goes through the roof).

If you're dating someone, you may stress out trying to find the "perfect" meaningful gift ("What says 'I care' in a way that won't freak him out?")... or waste hours needlessly searching
for the "hidden meaning" behind your date's present (e.g. "I wanted jewelry and he got me a blender").

Now don't get me wrong... when observed in the APPROPRIATE spirit (a lighthearted day to celebrate love, a great excuse to eat chocolate all day), Valentine's Day can be great fun.

I only take issue with the holiday when all of the pink-and-red decorations, overflowing candy aisles and "a Diamond is Forever" commercials cause a perfectly beautiful and amazing creature like you to feel overwhelmed or inadequate.

So whether you're planning on hiding out and waiting for the day to pass...

...Or are looking forward for a creative way to RECLAIM Valentine's Day - a celebration that will take this over-hyped holiday and make it fun no matter what..

For women and men who are seeing someone casually, I have just one piece of advice: Try not to put too much importance on this one day.

If your date plans a night out, great! Have fun, but don't judge the status of your relationship entirely on what happens on this one day. If you're not serious, I suggest getting your day a humorous card (steer clear of the mushy-gushy cards or he/she might read too much into it) and maybe bake him/her some cookies, but leave it at that. (That means NO stuffed puppy dogs holding red satin hearts that say 'I Woof You!')

Now if you DON'T get asked out by the person you're seeing, don't assume this means that he's/she's not interested in you. I've heard firsthand from many people that V-Day freaks them out. As we discussed above, they feel pressure from the outside world to make everything romantic and "perfect" and might not know how to do this if they're just in the beginning stages of getting to know you. It's likely that he just panicked and decided that beers with the guys is a lot less stressful than trying to impress you and possibly falling short of your expectations.
Unless you're serious/committed, cut him/her some slack.

And if you're SINGLE, well, the first important thing to remember is that you're not ALONE.

Although the greeting card, floral and diamond industry would have you believe that you're the only single person on the planet, nothing could be further from the truth. There are millions of people all over the world (a few supermodels included) who will be spending Valentine's Day without a date.

Here are 4 ways to celebrate (or not!):


4. TREAT V-DAY LIKE ANY OTHER SATURDAY.

On February 14th, go about your day as if it's just a normal Saturday and remember that there is absolutely no correlation between your self-worth and how cool your social plans are during one lousy 24-hour period. When you see lovey-dovey couples smooching on the subway on your
way to work, try to resist the urge to gag or yell "get a room!" Wow your boss with your clear-headed productivity on a day when others are distracted with Valentine's Day silliness. Head home and watch some TV, and go to bed early. Your body will love you for the extra rest and February 15th will be here before you know it!


3. SHARE YOUR LOVE WITH THOSE IN NEED.

If you have some free time on Valentine's Day, why not volunteer in your community? Whether you're helping out feeding the homeless at a soup kitchen, reading to children at an after-school program, visiting with the elderly at an assisted-living facility or walking dogs at a rescue shelter, sharing your love will definitely bring love back to you. When you're selflessly dedicating your time and energy to helping others, it's impossible to feel sorry for yourself. Plus you'll be brightening other people's day.And who knows? You might just meet a cute do-gooder guy/girl
there! BONUS!

2. DATE YOURSELF.

Just because you're not going out with a guy on Valentine's Day doesn't mean you can't have a fabulous date night... with yourself! Now before you say, "Easy for you to say"I have to tell you that THIS is what I'M doing for V-Day.. I plan on treating myself to a massage at my favorite spa, followed by ordering in dinner from my favorite restaurant and a horror movie! I am really looking forward to the opportunity to relax and pamper myself - you should too!

1. HOST A GIRLS' - BOYS'-NIGHT-IN.

Whether you're feeling ambitious (dinner party) or lazy invite your single mates over to commiserate, laugh, and chat.